I have to say that I have certainly enjoyed the past Chinese New Year celebrations.
The many carefree days were spent visiting relatives from my family and those from my wife’s family.
There was a common theme through these visits. There was a sense of joy and happiness of seeing each other. I saw the blessed grace that allows us to eat a meal together or even just sit around the hall talking to each other.
I saw that many of my aunties and uncles were growing old. Without me realizing, many of them were going past sixty years old. Even my parents are around that age now.
So I feel some sadness amidst this joy of catching up with each other, of letting them see how baby Rachel has grown, of talking about other relatives, and of giving and receiving gifts.
I realize that one day these uncles and aunties won’t be around any longer.
I start to regret those years where I didn’t care, or left everything to my parents. I regret taking for granted the time that we have together, those many opportunities wasted.
After I got married, I am continually torn between spending time with my wife and baby, or spending time with my relatives. Something always came up. The baby was sick, we had to buy something, we had an appointment, the weather was hot or raining.
I kept pushing those visits to the next week or the next month. Before I knew it, it’s Chinese New Year again and I meet them only to find that they have gotten thinner, their hair whiter, their bodies bent a bit more, their hands more fragile, their voices a bit more softer.
If there was ever one thing that I wish I can do now is that I can make up for lost time before it’s too late. But I worry what others may think. Would they think that I have ulterior motives for ‘suddenly’ being so nice?
I hope that in this year I will be able to be different.
Do you experience this too? What advice would you give me?
Photo By: Jayson Kingsbeer